We have been living in Iowa now for three whole months! To be honest, it has felt like a really long three months with the COVID-19 pandemic, the racial divide in our country and the riots, everything with the election and the media, downsizing our lives, moving states, and being pregnant.
There have been many times I have wanted to be done with living in the camper (and that’s not good considering that we are only three months in and still have at least a year left). As we drove back from our anniversary trip in Wisconsin I had this overwhelming feeling of homesickness. Usually when coming home from a vacation you’re eager to get back. With the exception of seeing my daughter, I didn’t feel like I was going “home”. Maybe that’s normal when you move, but for a week or two I was desperately missing my hometown, friends, and having a house with more space.
I miss a lot of things like a big couch, a kitchen to easily cook things in and more counter space, a bathroom that two people can fit in, a king-sized bed, having the cat litter box in the garage, having a dining room where fitting a high chair isn’t an issue, and I especially miss a room for my baby. Oh, and a Target nearby, good coffee, and a decent sandwich shop.
I’m learning that the tension I’m feeling isn’t always because of the camper and sometimes mothering a (sweet and sassy) toddler would be difficult no matter where I am living. As my due date draws closer I also have some anxiousness about how life will be like with two babies under two years old and living in a tiny space.
Then I remember my WHY and I’m okay again (but I often have to remind myself because I am still human). My home is where my husband and daughter are. We didn’t do this because it would be easy or comfortable. We have a plan and I can visually see on paper when we’ll be able to have a “home” again. My daughters won’t remember living in a small space and how little of toys they had to play with, but they will remember being loved so much and getting so much time with their parents and grandparents. We are so blessed to get this “restart” and to set our family up for success for the future!